I guess the season is over (sigh), but that does not mean we can’t start preparing for next year.

1. Mini-skirts. I am really opposed to all skirt wearing at a baseball game, but I guess I could see the function in a modest jean skirt on a really hot day. So, I’ll just say mini skirts, because it is a baseball game not a look-at-your-underwear game.

2. Heavy makeup. Personally, I rarely wear makeup–ever, but mainly because I don’t know how to look good in makeup. Still, a baseball game is not the place for your liquid black eyeliner, glittery eye shadow, and foundation so thick you can’t even sweat it off in 3 hours. Try to use a little control–you’re oustide for heaven’s sake.

3. High heels. No, just no. You have to walk from the car to the stadium, there are ramps and stairs and LOTS OF WALKING. Heels are UNACCEPTABLE.

4. Cologne/Perfume. I know that a lot of people like a good scent, but for me the smell of either smelly spray gives me a headache. We’re sitting in close quarters here, no one wants to smell your P-Diddy crap.

5. PINK JERSEYS. Or ANYTHING with the team logo on it in pink. I do not know any major league teams that have pink as a team or uniform color, THEREFORE THERE SHOULD BE NO PINK JERSEYS. If you want to wear pink, fine, but do not sully the team you are pretending to root for with that baby pink barf. Be a real fan, wear the red! (Unless of course it is breast cancer awareness, then I temporarily lift my ban on team-themed pink).

6. A jersey for a team that is not playing at the game you are attending. Hey, we’re at Busch Stadium and the Cardinals are playing the Cubs and you’ve got a Diamondbacks shirt on, WHAT? Save your D-back fan-age for some other day, dude.

And those are Nicole’s rules for proper attire at a baseball game. You have been warned.